[subaru doesn't, either. it's why he gets petty instead, and then just lets it go. tucks it under the bridge as if to feed the troll that lives beneath, turning his eyes from the darkness that grows and grows. he doesn't even hate the people who were responsible for his father.]

Um... Mmm.

[he doesn't want to tell the whole lead up... it's stupid and silly and selfish, and it hurts too. but there's other things he can talk about, that he can bring up, and maybe he can wrap around to the thing that's gently pushed his thoughts over the edge.]

I like poking fun at them sometimes 'cause they're easy to trick, but I stopped that once they told me to... I probably project on them or something 'cause we've got some similarities, like you say I do with you, and you don't seem to like that so why would they? I always bring them dark places knowing they don't like the dark, I've pushed 'em until they told me things they didn't want to tell me, I keep giving them what's gotta sound like false hope about their future even if I-- you know.

[even if he really believes it, that they can find a way to fix things. little does he know things are in motion to aim towards just that, one domino after another.]

I showed them a totally uncool side of me too recently, during Hina-chan's birthday. [to put it lightly. that's very lightly.] I mean, I... don't really care what other people think of me, 'cause they've always thought whatever they wanted anyway, [but he does care, a little, enough to put up with things in first year and dog after his own false hope of friendship and attention,] but I don't want Keigo to think they can't rely on me or anything like that. Y'know?

[... something like that... it all sounds like venting, but there's just too much that's not needless or pointless whining for it to be that.]