so that's the way komaeda thinks of him. subaru laughs a little, in that "really?" sort of way, and shakes his head. he's a little irate, because saying he'd hesitate? he's only hesitated about a few things in his life, most of them about his own feelings, but he doesn't this time.]
You don't know me at all, Maddy. I didn't hesitate nearly getting myself killed for them, I was halfway off the roof before I knew what was happening. They're important to me, y'know? And whatever they think of me... [home, someone who could give them a flickering of possibly false hope, someone who makes them feel "special" with a call of their name -- "like you're seeing me for me", they'd said] Keigo's always going to be Keigo, and I'd risk my neck for any of my precious friends. Even you.
[even if komaeda doesn't want him to, never wanted him to. consideration, inconsideration -- that's subjective to subaru especially, because he's at least learning to be considerate of others and has been for a few years. there's bumps, there's relapses and drawbacks, but he wants to be considerate of his friends, which is why he sticks his nose where it doesn't belong, why he hadn't told amami about the contract since he had so much other grief going on (which was, he found out, a mistake, and won't make that mistake again), why he did tell komaeda about it since he knew he couldn't do anything alone. why he keeps natsume out of it all.
why he continues to simply give keigo happy memories to clear out the lonely ones, and would do the same for any of his friends in a heartbeat.
but it's a lot to say, and subaru doesn't feel like spilling his guts that much. nothing's ever good enough for him, or for amami, anyway.]
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so that's the way komaeda thinks of him. subaru laughs a little, in that "really?" sort of way, and shakes his head. he's a little irate, because saying he'd hesitate? he's only hesitated about a few things in his life, most of them about his own feelings, but he doesn't this time.]
You don't know me at all, Maddy. I didn't hesitate nearly getting myself killed for them, I was halfway off the roof before I knew what was happening. They're important to me, y'know? And whatever they think of me... [home, someone who could give them a flickering of possibly false hope, someone who makes them feel "special" with a call of their name -- "like you're seeing me for me", they'd said] Keigo's always going to be Keigo, and I'd risk my neck for any of my precious friends. Even you.
[even if komaeda doesn't want him to, never wanted him to. consideration, inconsideration -- that's subjective to subaru especially, because he's at least learning to be considerate of others and has been for a few years. there's bumps, there's relapses and drawbacks, but he wants to be considerate of his friends, which is why he sticks his nose where it doesn't belong, why he hadn't told amami about the contract since he had so much other grief going on (which was, he found out, a mistake, and won't make that mistake again), why he did tell komaeda about it since he knew he couldn't do anything alone. why he keeps natsume out of it all.
why he continues to simply give keigo happy memories to clear out the lonely ones, and would do the same for any of his friends in a heartbeat.
but it's a lot to say, and subaru doesn't feel like spilling his guts that much. nothing's ever good enough for him, or for amami, anyway.]